There are many things you can choose in life, but siblings is not one of them. If you had a brother or a sister growing up, chances are that the two (or 3 or 4) of you got into some heated disagreements from time to time. Bickering with your sibling comes like second nature, with chances of your children following in your footsteps highly likely. It’s best to make the situation easier, even if sometimes they want to pull one another’s hair out—or even have. It’s not reality for your children to skip off merrily hand in hand with constant professions of admiration for one another, but it is very possible and attainable to get them to understand what it is to love each other.

Make the Two Share a Bedroom:
It’s a given that no parent likes it when their children fight. To fix things before they present a huge problem in the household, it’s best to nip fighting in the butt then and there. This problem can be especially prevalent for children of the same gender who happen to also be close in age. My advice to diffuse the hair pulling and ear-piercing shrills, make your two boys or two girls share a bedroom. This was the most random advice I ever received from a woman I met at a jungle gym, after watching her two girls get along like best buds while playing. At the time my two girls were in constant battle with one another, not only for attention from Mommy and Daddy, but for anything imaginable that could be disagreed upon.

Even if you have a nice sized home that doesn’t necessarily require the two kids to share a room, do this to help diffuse the constant arguing—and quick. Once I did this for my children, they realized it was theirs together, and the competition lessened a great deal. Now 9 months later I’m the one at the park with the sweet siblings that other mothers may envy.

Kiss and Makeup:
This gives “be nice to your brother/sister” a new meaning. In the moments where kids fight, and they will, once you are forced to break it up it’s important to make them apologize to one another for their actions. My girls are young, so I even make them throw in the added hug when telling them that they are sorry for what they’ve done. I don’t care where we are or what happened between the two, I make my children embrace one another so that the other knows they are sorry for what they did.

Kids can’t help themselves, so if you give them an inch they will take a mile, and they need to be firmly informed that being mean to their sibling is just not cool. The younger child may be fed up with being picked on or told what to do when they reach their breaking point one day, so you may find that you’re having to tell your younger one to cut it out more often that big brother or sister.

Do NOT favor one of the children:
Every parent is guilty of this from time to time, and grandparents can be especially known for doing this. To ease tension in a home with children who argue, you must treat all children equally to not pour grease on the fire. Children are sensitive and don’t always understand certain things, so you have to make things easier on them by treating all of the children in the family the same so one doesn’t start to feel left out. Save the competition for sports, and don’t make one of your children feel the need to compete for your attention and affection. By taking this into consideration, this should help to ease tension between your children. I treat my children as equals, because they are, both my children who I love exactly the same. If one gets something, the other should, too. Because favoritism will not go unnoticed in the eyes of an impressionable child vying for your love.

About This Blogger: Modi Palmer

modiModi Palmer resides in Houston, Texas with her family. She loves to write, talk about all things mom/child, watch NFL football, and knows her way around the kitchen. She believes that life is short to be taken too seriously, and she tries to find humor in all situations. Her source of happiness stems from her family, and doing what she loves—writing.